This one actually hits close to home.

Back in that bygone era of 1998 (or so) i lived in a two-story house in college park, more or less subdivided into two apartments - four guys, four girls, three dogs, a snake, a cat.... fuckin' madhouse really. it was a good time, that joint. the doors that divided the apartments weren't ever really closed, and it was a pretty eclectic crowd. lots o' stories. we had the hot chick, the lesbos (not the hot ckick, unfortunately), the hippie girl, the football jock, the hockey jock (not me), the nerd (there, that's me), and the redneck boxer (around whom the story revolves).

anyways, we threw a number of parties, each successively bigger than the last. started with one keg, and close friends and eventually snowballed into 6-8 keg events with the cops making hourly appearances. we had a huge deck out back - length of the house, and level with the second story. we'd stick a couple of kegs up there, and a couple on the ground below. they were great fun.... until my roommates car got stolen.... and the girls' VCR. that was it, these parties had gotten too big, and we all got together and agreed, as fun and as loaded with wholly illegal profits as these parties might be, we had to put a stop to them. we were deeply saddened, but all good things must come to an end, and these were getting so big that we were bound to get in some trouble anyways.

fast forward to a few months later when the lease is coming to a close. most everybody is taking off, except for me, hockey jock, and the redneck boxer. we have a few discussions about keeping the house, finding new roommates, etc. where redneck boxer mentions the prospect of moving all of his redneck friends in. me and hockey jock are not interested. these assholes regularly crash our joint on weekday evenings, playing pool directly outside our rooms, with the music volume on "deafening" until 3, 4 in the morning. repeated polite inquiries as to whether there might be other places they could engage in such activities result in nothing, and a couple of confrontations ensue. these redneck friends would be hell to live with.

noting our disapproval, redneck boxer decides the proper way to resolve the issue is to go to the landlord, tell him that no one else is interested in staying, and his friends are ready to sign a lease. landlord, not bothering to call the rest of us, agrees, and unbeknownst to me the lease is signed. nothing is said until about two weeks 'til i'm to be out on my ass, when redneck boxer casually brings this up in conversation, leading to one of the greatest shouting/shoving matches of all time (i held, my own, i'll have you know - impressive, cause jackass redneck or no, he was one tough mofo). anyways, i quickly realize that even winning the argument and staying in the house sentences me to a life of living with low-life moe-rons who will do everything in their power to make my life miserable, so me and hockey jock quickly find a third roommate, and find another house.

that's nice, but what about the deck? you say...

patience, grasshopper, patience....

the summer passes, and i run into these punks about college park from time to time. we say "hi" and whatnot, but that's about it.

anyways, beginning of the next semester is party season again, and i head to a particularly lame a-capella party (ah, the excitement that lies in store for little TK), and take off early to hit the bar, get a late burger, a couple of beers, whatever....

soon me and the chick i'm with are caught up talking to the folks next to us about some party they were at where the deck collapsed and all these people were hurt. one girl was taken away unconcious, and a bunch of others left in ambulances. scary shit....

it wasn't until a week later that i ran into one of the chicks downstairs on campus and found out it was OUR old house. luckily no one died, but 10-15 people were hurt, one chick in particular with several broken bones, a broken collarbone, and a puntured lung. last i heard, about a year later, the landlord and all eight guys on the lease were being sued for some ungodly sum of money. sure was glad that dude was dickhead enough to cut us out of the lease.

so, when this happened in chicago, it made me cringe. it's only the whims of fate that it's those kids and not me.